What I've Learned About Gambling
So, let me acknowledge this right away: I know this piece is controversial.
Some people will say I must have rocks in my head because this city is not, nor will it ever be, on the gambler's side. Trying your luck at a slot machine is a colorful way of lighting money on fire. So why am I giving gambling advice?
Because you're in Las Vegas. You're here, you're partying, and the cocktail waitress is bringing you another shot. You're going to gamble, so you may as well be as smart as possible.
So, here's Mikey's lesson #1 if you’re going to try your luck and gamble in Sin City. Don't be one of those unsuspecting tourists who are convinced they’re gonna strike it big at one of the major casinos on the Las Vegas Strip; if you’re going to gamble, do it as far away from the Strip casinos as you can, even if it’s just a mile or two away. It's far easier to earn comps off-Strip.
Next, forget about your lucky slot machine. I get it. Once you sit at that machine, how could you not win? It’s VEGAS BABY!!! I hate to break it to you folks, but putting bill after bill into “your machine” is the equivalent of throwing your money down the sewer until you’re so broke that you have to get a new part-time job when you fly home.
Now, after living here most of my life, losing a f*ck-ton of money, and watching friends and even family members succumb to the ravages of gambling addiction, I've managed to pick up a few more tips. Ready? Okay, here we go:
